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childofthefaerie
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Name: Katie
Country: United States
State: Alabama
Metro: Huntsville
Birthday: 1/7/1987
Gender: Female
Interests: video games because i'm awesome at them, music (i'm very open about the whole thing and listen to pretty much whatever...except country. i hate country music), movies, books, writing, coming up w/ new smoothie flavors, being warm, languages, different cultures, traveling... ummm, lots of other things that i dont feel like listing. and the playas! you people are the awesomest. <3
Expertise: I c an make a pretty damn good smoothie, I can play video games (and I enjoy them), I draw and paint
Occupation: Student
Industry: Entertainment
Message: message meEmail: email me
AIM:  katiedid35801
Member Since:
11/11/2003
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| I should be happy...I am happy...for the most part.
I haven't seen my home, my room, my pets, my little old life and style of living since August. I've been away from that place for a while now. I won't be back until December. There's I'll stay for a month, at the most, and then it will be back to here.
Here-the place of transition. From parents to self living. I am a vagabond. I have no true home. Or so it feels. I'll go back to Huntsville, take in the sights, sounds, colors, people, lifestyle, ect...but will it ever be the same? I'm afraid of it. Afraid of the memories. I have some beautiful memories of that place that are too perfect to be ruined. I want to leave them in my mind as is. They shouldn't be exposed to truth, for fear of fading.
Where do I belong in the scheme of things. I feel comfortable here, in Atlanta. I understand it, know it, accept it. But do I think I'll stay here? I don't know...I don't think so. But where will I go after all of this is done? I think I know what I want to do and where I'll go.....but what......
I am a lone feline, slinking her way through life. Subtle, sensual, light, alert, won't go out of her way for attention, but eats it up when fed attention, the careful observer, multiple personalities, warm and caring to those whom I care for, feisty and free...free to make choices. Choices. Chose. Listen. Listen to the wind passing through brittle, dying leaves. Leaves that have sucked dry the hard hard earth. The earth, which is moving, spinning forever through the galaxies of time and space. Space that has an end that is forever unreachable by our hands...Our hands which are clever little things, nimble and quick to make our lives easier...Easier. As you get older, things don't become easier because there are more choices to make which complicate our lives.
But...I have gotten into all of the class that I want for next semester. So there. I am happy.
Directing, History of Drama & Theater II, Speeches & Monologues, Theatre Colloquium, and Native American Art.
Finally. I'm almost done with my major...I'll either need only 3-4 more classes next year to finish it up.
I love you all and can't wait to see your faces during the holiday season.
I have something for you.
~Katie~
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| I am only being myself...
the beauty of the night
transfers over into the morning,
leading to
sweet seconds of unfocussed feelings, which
explode. subside. hide.
i am only who i am. you love that. and i smile at that fact.
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| I haven't used you in forever, my dear xanga...mostly because I no longer feel compelled to write down daily happenings of my life. I just wanted to say that I'm not fond of people who are always changing their minds about how they feel. People who don't take the time to get to know someone, when they really should. It pisses me off that there are people out there, whole families of them, who can't seem to get it right. They can have someone or something that might just be perfect and keeps them sane, but they can't handle that and in the end, hurt that thing/person.
It's upsetting and not worth my tears. Not anymore. Luckily, I have an amazing family who I can talk to about pretty much anything...haha, but my dad informed us during dinner that they don't want to know everything that we do. But, we keep them happy with what we tell them. Also, let me make one thing clear...if you mess with one person in
my family, you mess with all of us and the friends who care. Look, sometimes people, especially parents, don't need to know everything. Learn to get a spine and stand up to these kind of things.
As my mother put it, humans aren't supposed to just sit around and do nothing. Being depressed isn't what life is about. We having a fucking whole world to explore and see, and if you're the type to sit around and wallow in your depression, then you deserve that. If you can't pick yourself up and get a new view on life, then please, don't pass it onto others. No one wants that. I'm sorry if you're sad, but look, we have ample opportunities given to us. Sure, some of them might be harder to obtain then others, but if you don't fight for it, then you have no passion for it and shouldn't be pursuing it. I'm proud of Chris and Katie B for making it into their schools and following and fighting for what they want.
Don't even get me started on money. Money is a curse. However, I'm not going to lie. I'd like to be rich, most people would because they believe that it will solve all their problems...No, it really doesn't. Richest people are some of the most miserable people on the planet. I'd really just like to be comfortable in the end. Don't let money be an issue when it comes to your life. Oh, and people who dangle money/trustfunds/objects in front of you as collateral for doing something are terrible people. If they have any respect for you and/or love you, they won't do that.
I'm angry, pissed off, upset and furious with the way things have turned out. I am. I want to slap at least one person really hard and tell them to get a life and stop living in a world of doing what they're told too. Gaaaah, I'm so mad! I am! I'm sick of this, I am. I wish I could just snap my fingers and make it end, but it's not that easy. It never is, not when you care.
Fuck this. Stop being a puppet and cut your own damn strings because, believe me, no one else can.
I've tried.
Thank you for reading my angry rant. I feel only a bit better. I really want to be myself again. I don't know what happened to me....also, once again I find solace in Kelly Clarkson's music.
Katie-the Pissed
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| Hi, it's 5:50AM here in Georgia. I'm on my first midnight-8AM shift...it's going well so far. I'm still awake. If I stay awake that will make Ashley and I stronger than the two boys who did midnight-8. They both slept, but Mike did stay up all night his last night.
HA.
Acer corpus, acris mens, arcis anima.
Strong body, strong mind, strong soul.
That's my new motto. And it's not even like I got to sleep all day today too. No, I was up by 8:30 and taking a shower to go to work. I worked until 1:45 and then got some sleep between 3-5:30 and now I'm here, awake until 9ish. I don't get to go to sleep until after I count breakfast and take a shower. Eww. Then I get to sleep and do the night shift two more times.
Then...the beach!!! YAY!!! Outter Banks!
Things have been interesting here. I don't really know exactly how to explain it all, but it's been...something else.
Well, the sun will be rising in about half an hour. They say, I'm not sure who "they" is, but they always say that the darkest hour is right before dawn...it's true.
Well, I'm going to go I guess. My brain's a little befuddled right now because it's been a long long long long long day.
Love,
~Katie~
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| I'm terribly sad right now.
I think it's the distance between me and those I love in Huntsville. I need you all in my life to bring me a sense of love and real people. Something I haven't had in awhile and won't be seeing for some time. I didn't realize it was going to be this hard on me...I can't really stand being away. It's eating away at me and I find myself bursting into tears when I'm by myself. The comfort and closeness I feel with my friends back in Huntsville is something I didn't really have at school and don't' have so much here. I miss it. I need it. You don't really realize all you need until you no longer have it and it wears away with you.
I cry.
I don't want too...but that doesn't stop the tears from coming.
You don't realize how much it would mean to me to have people come and visit.
I feel like I'm on and island, with only the ocean and the horizon in my sight.
I'd kill for a hug right now.
Anything to stop this crying.
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